Tuesday, October 28, 2008

How the stock market works

How the stock market works:

Once upon a time in a place overrun with monkeys, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for $10 each. The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest, and started catching them.

The man bought thousands at $10 and as supply started to diminish, they became harder to catch, so the villagers stopped their effort.

The man then announced that he would now pay $20 for each one. This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. But soon the supply diminished even further and they were ever harder to catch, so people started going back to their farms and forgot about monkey catching.

The man increased his price to $25 each and the supply of monkeys became so sparse that it was an effort to even see a monkey, much less catch one.

The man now announced that he would buy monkeys for $50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on his behalf.

While the man was away the assistant told the villagers. "Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has bought. I will sell them to you at $35 each and when the man returns from the city, you can sell them to him for $50 each."

The villagers rounded up all their savings and bought all the monkeys.

They never saw the man nor his assistant again and once again there were monkeys everywhere.

Now you have a better understanding of how the stock market works.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

**Shaadi Say Pehlay** **Shaadi Kay Baad**

Shaadi ke pehle - Maine Pyar Kiya
Shaadi ke baad - Ye Maine Kya Kiya?

Shaadi ke pehle - Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
Shaadi ke baad - Kuch Nahi Hota Ha

Shaadi ke pehle - Dil To Pagal Hai
Shaadi ke baad - Dil To Pagal Tha

Shaadi ke pehle - Ek Duje Ke Liye
Shaadi ke baad - Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye

Shaadi ke pehle - Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge
Shaadi ke baad - Baaki Log Sukhi Ho Jayenge

Shaadi ke pehle - Chandramukhi
Shaadi ke baad - Jwaalamukhi

Shaadi ke pehle - Kuwara Baap
Shaadi ke baad - Bechara Baap

Shaadi ke pehle - Titanic
Shaadi ke baad - Mortgage

Shaadi ke pehle - Hum Aapke Hai Koun?
Shaadi ke baad - Barbadi Ka Reason

Shaadi ke pehle - Aao Pyar Karen
Shaadi ke baad - Aur Bhi Kuch Kaam Karen?

Shaadi ke pehle - chal chayya chayya
Shaadi ke baad - ah aab laut chale

Shaadi ke pehle - hum aapke dil main rehte hain
Shaadi ke baad - hum apke ghar main rehte hain

Shaadi ke pehle - arzoo
Shaadi ke baad - ansoo

Shaadi ke pehle - soldier
Shaadi ke baad - major sahib

Shaadi ke pehle - pyaar hona hi tha
Shaadi ke baad - meri saath esa kyu hua

Shaadi ke pehle - jeevan saathi
Shaadi ke baad - bachcho ke baad, bangaye hathi

Shaadi ke pehle - deewana
Shaadi ke baad - anjaam

Shaadi ke pehle - laila majnoo
Shaadi ke baad - dono majnoon

Monday, October 13, 2008

Gravity defying poo

When my sister was about three I was getting her ready to have a bath. I left her alone for about two minutes and when I came back she'd pooed all over my room. My mum came down and we cleaned the floor up. But then I noticed something astounding, I shouted up to my Mum 'Mum, Grace has pooed on the wall'. She shouted back 'Well get some tissue to wipe it off then.' I replied 'No, you misunderstand me. She has actually done a poo on the wall'. It was quite a sight, god knows how she performed this gravity defying stunt, but we were so impressed at the turd, a foot from the ground and showing no signs of heading to earth, that we rang our neighbor up to come and have a look as well.